ick.

I promised myself I wouldn't blog about you today.
I've promised myself a lot of things..

But I had a serious thought today; I'm not like you. I'm not "your kind" of girl; I wast thinking of the girls you hang out with, the people you relate to. You couldn't possibly consider me a viable option compared to them; they're so smart, and while i'm not dumb I certainly didn't get an 800 on any section of my SAT's. Maybe everytime you say I "amuse" you its because you think I'm a fool. jesters were amusing. So is the kid in class that doesn't understand anything. Is that how you see me? As much as I hope every time you scrunch your face to the side when I ask you a question that's probably really easy for you is your way of telling me something, its probably nothing and I'm probably over-thinking all of this. All I know is that every time I see you my belly has a happy explosion and I keep thinking of what it would be like to hold your hand. But that's my end. And only my end...

My mother has me in a choke hold and I am turning purple.
I am seriously going crazy in this house.
i cannot wait to leave this behind me.