The right person will stiill think the sun shines out of your ass.

My parent's marriage didn't work out. Okay, in all honesty that's being really nice. My parent's marriage didn't really even exist in more than a sense more than on paper and legal documents and such.
Most couples I've grown up seeing hate each other. I have no idea why they got married in the first place. For my parents, it was Dylan. They had nine months to plan and perform a wedding. (it went off like a shot) Marriage and love and everything that really goes along with that- I'm not sure if I can believe in love.
I'm very much in love with the idea of it. That it sweeps over you and makes you happy. I just doubt that it can actually work out. Its been proven to me that it can't more than it can. I'm starting to doubt that love even is a thing. Maybe you're right- love is an emotion that humans make up in order to reproduce...
I don't think that there could ever really be a huge moment like that for me. Any moment when I completely give in with someone and know I want to spend forever with them.. Most people drive me crazy. I really have a low tolerance for bullshit. I get really frustrated. I like to be in the loop. I like when things go my way. If anyone could actually fall in love with that, that's stupid.
There was an instance when I thought I loved someone, truly. I don't believe I really, truly, deeply did though. It was more of a "I am going to fall in love with you... NOW" and so I believed enough that I was, when I cared for him, but not before myself.
You should have come out tonight. At least after I decorated your yard. At least after you could tell that I wanted to see you. I made it so clear to you. There was no possible way that you couldn't hear the longing in my voice. And when you didn't come outside something happened, I got really sad. But you stood up to me. Maybe you were teasing me. Maybe you were being a jerk. Maybe you were just too cold. But you didn't want to go outside and all my begging and pleading didn't sway you. That's never happened.
I need you to know everything that goes through my head when my phone lights up and its you. Maybe I'm just becoming older and my human instincts are telling me I have to reproduce.. But I don't want to believe that theory.